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A woman attacks police with her breast milk, the Scioto Mile gets a messy debut and (surprise!) Gov. Kasich makes a few appearances. Oh, and didn't the Ohio State football team make the news at one point? A look at some of the ridiculous and outrageous happenings of the past year.
© 2012 Crestock
You don ’t want to know what Jym Ganahl wrote off
Former TV anchor Anietra Hamper was cited by the
TP Party
Senate Republicans attending a retreat at Cherry Valley Lodge toilet-papered the yard, mailbox and car of state Rep. Jay Hottinger, who lives near the Licking County facility.
Anthony Weiner was just getting comfortable in his new job
A Groveport Madison Middle School educator was put on administrative leave in connection to an incident in which a student discovered a photo of a penis on a school-owned iPad.
Known as the Scioto River lily
Hundreds of people showed up at the OSU greenhouse to see a rare and exotic plant that smelled like rotting meat.
“Your honor, is that a gavel under your robe or are you just happy to see me?”
A former legal intern for Franklin County Environmental Judge Harland Hale accused him of introducing her as “the hot intern.”
The Muskingum County sheriff took care of the rest
Columbus Zoo officials located six of 11 prairie dogs that escaped from temporary housing.
What are the odds?
Former Ohio State quarterback Art Schlichter pleaded guilty to stealing up to $2.5 million he used in part to fuel his gambling addiction.
Parents kept their children home the day she taught about the Holocaust
To teach students about cultural diversity, a Gahanna teacher divided a class into two groups: “masters” and “slaves.” The kids in the “slaves” group were offered for sale in a mock auction, complete with bidders checking the muscle size of the “slaves” and looking in their mouths to see who had stronger teeth.
Adam Sandler bought the movie rights
Two Canal Winchester students were booted from a school bus for their simultaneous flatulence. As repeat offenders (they’d passed gas together just a few weeks before), the school deemed the actions as “obscene gestures” and suspended the boys from the bus for one day each.
New Albany residents offered to pay Michael Jeffries to stop wearing flip-flops
Abercrombie & Fitch offered a “substantial payment” to “Jersey Shore” star Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino and his cast mates to stop wearing the brand on their popular reality TV program.
The Blue Jackets gave her $10,001 to wear their hat
After national media reportedly spotted murder suspect Casey Anthony (above) in Columbus wearing an Ohio State baseball cap soon after her acquittal, WNCI deejays Dave and Jimmy offered to pay her $10,000 not to be an OSU fan.
Tim Hortons is no longer the official doughnut of the Crew
A former Toronto FC player taunted Columbus Crew fans in an Internet video, saying “After the guys in yellow stop cheering, they still have to go back to Columbus.”
He then tore his ACL
A reporter from the gossip website TMZ confused former OSU basketball star Greg Oden with LeBron James. When asked if he was at least a ballplayer, Oden replied, “I tried, but I’m not good at it.”
McRage
A teen allegedly tossed an unsavory chicken nugget out his car window while in the parking lot of a Gahanna McDonald’s. The meat struck another car pulling into the lot, causing the angry driver to punch out the teen’s window.
The money would end up back at White Castle anyway
White Castle reached an out-of-court settlement with a 290-pound New York man who sued the restaurant chain because he couldn’t fit into a booth.
He cashed in his rewards points for jailhouse smokes
A stolen credit card was traced to a 19-year-old Heath man when he used it at a gas station, along with a gas rewards card, which had his name and other information.
He was awarded a waterproof cap and gown
U.S. House speaker John Boehner gave Ohio State’s spring commencement address.
The toilets were put on lockdown
Alan Patton (above), who was caught trying to collect urine from children in 2009, asked a judge for jail time rather than house arrest after he was convicted of criminal mischief for loitering in a Lewis Center Burger King bathroom.
Alan Patton requested community service there
Shortly after unveiling the $44 million downtown Scioto Mile development, city officials were forced to institute regular bathroom breaks to keep kids from relieving themselves in the park’s vast array of fountains.
She gave him a stiff arm , spiked the ring in the end zone and burned a couch on Chittenden Avenue
Johnny Wakefield, a Michigan fan, proposed to his girlfriend, Abbey Zellers, a Buckeye diehard, at the 50-yard line of Ohio Stadium.
She also was cited for not carrying a concealed weapons permit
A Westerville woman sprayed Delaware County sheriff deputies with breast milk when they tried to arrest her.
Hey, they’re not her constituents
State Rep. Nancy Garland, a Democrat from New Albany, mistakenly said in a statement she wanted to “destroy the Middle Class.”
Missing the point!!
When informed in an e-mail about allegations Ohio State football players violated NCAA rules by trading memorabilia for tattoos, coach Jim Tressel wrote back, saying, among other things, “I hear you!!” “It’s unbelievable!!” “Go Bucks!!”
Too much transparency in government
Franklin County Common Pleas Judge Julie Lynch complained that a glass staircase (left) at the new county courthouse allowed people to look up women’s skirts.
Lindsay Lohan would be proud
A Columbus woman, mistaking a police cruiser for a cab, climbed into the vehicle and demanded the officer “take her for some drinks and drugs.”
In his defense, it’s not easy lugging that giant rubber stamp to council meetings every week
A few days before he faced election, Columbus City Councilman Hearcel Craig (whose Lexus is photographed at right) acknowledged he inappropriately used a handicap parking permit issued to his dead mother.
His mother’s corpse will be on the Democratic ticket next year
Craig was reelected.
We’re No. 1?
TV cameras captured Green Bay Packers linebacker A.J. Hawk, a former OSU star, flashing a middle finger at someone on his team’s sideline during a game.
The Kasich Files
Then Kasich ran him over with his bus
Soon after being sworn in as governor, a video surfaced of Gov. John Kasich calling a Columbus police officer an “idiot” for giving him a traffic ticket.
He also offered him a bag of doughnuts and invited him to a screening of Smokey and the Bandit
Kasich personally apologized to the officer.
Now who’s the idiot?
For a few hours in early June, visitors to Kasich’s state-sponsored website, governor.ohio.gov, could watch the controversial “idiot” video. The folly was attributed to a “glitch,” according to his staffers.
Art Modell also was presented with a Governor’s Award
In suburban Cleveland, Kasich, a Pennsylvania native and Pittsburgh Steelers backer, taunted Cleveland Browns fans: “When you win a Super Bowl, let me know.”
Several Browns fans had been sighted downtown
Kasich proposed installing metal detectors at state buildings.
He next commissioned a dome for the Statehouse
At a press conference announcing the elimination of the pink Ohio driver licenses, Kasich said, “I’m looking at this license, and . . . I realized, ‘I’m governor. I can fix this kind of thing.’ ”
Annual Awards Quiz
1. What company announced it was closing its popular Columbus outlet store in late January?
A. Macy’s.
B. JCPenney.
C. Eddie Bauer.
D. Chico’s.
2. Despite what has become a bitter basketball rivalry between Ohio State and Wisconsin, many fans of both schools united during a March game at Value City Arena to protest what?
A. The U.S. government’s lack of support for Libyan rebels.
B. Joblessness in both states.
C. Excessive government spending.
D. Bills in both states that would restrict or hinder unions’ abilities to bargain collectively.
3. In response to rising gas prices, Fairfield County sheriff Dave Phalen asked his deputies in April to drive slower, spend more time on foot talking with residents and what else?
A. Purchase groceries for the fuel rewards.
B. Give added protection to local gas stations in return for “fuel favors.”
C. Siphon fuel from impounded vehicles.
D. Occasionally use golf carts for patrolling.
4. A 23-year-old man was wounded by a shotgun blast in a Clintonville basement in April while he and several friends were doing what?
A. Filming an amateur movie.
B. Using the shotgun to smoke marijuana.
C. Playing “Shot Potato,” a variation of Hot Potato.
D. Trying to change the channel on their television without the remote control.
5. According to the Sports Illustrated exposé detailing the Ohio State scandal, how many players are “either known or alleged to have traded or sold memorabilia in violation of NCAA rules”?
A. 6.
B. 28.
C. 15.
D. 11.
6. Which NFL team drafted former Ohio State quarterback Terrelle Pryor in the league’s late August supplemental draft?
A. Tennessee Titans.
B. Oakland Raiders.
C. San Francisco 49ers.
D. Cincinnati Bengals.
7. What exotic animal was found by a passerby along I-270 in September?
A. A baby snapping turtle.
B. An armadillo.
C. A small alligator.
D. A flamingo.
8. Organizers of the Columbus Italian Festival in October put Columbus on the map as a Guinness World Record-holder by creating what?
A. The largest tablecloth, measuring 550-by-45 feet.
B. The longest string of angel hair pasta, measuring 67 feet.
C. The fattest cannoli, weighing 85 pounds.
D. The biggest meatball, weighing 1,110 pounds.
9. The Ohio Bureau of Motor Vehicles ruled in November that it is barring drivers from getting what kind of vanity license plate?
A. Those negatively referencing the state of Michigan.
B. Those conveying any sort of political leaning.
C. Those containing excessive amounts of slang.
D. Those containing any sort of symbol or innuendo.
Answers: 1: B; 2: D; 3: D; 4: A; 5: B; 6: B; 7: C; 8: D; 9: A.
