It's a Christmas miracle! New "Between Two Ferns," holiday spectacular!

Abernathy Miller, Columbus Alive

I'm just going to say it. I wish "Between Two Ferns" was a real show. I would watch it every day right after the "Channel 5 News" with Jan and Wayne Skylar, (the only married news team) and right before "Check It Out! With Dr. Steve Brule."

The latest short from Funny or Die features Samuel L. Jackson (sporting a gray sweat suit) and Toby McGuire, who is instructed by Galifianakis to "keep his fucking mouth shut."

Some other notable quotes include:

"I don't eat snails, but I like them," -Samuel L. Jackson.

"When did Hollywood become such a fucking... everybody's got to be a super hero now?" To which Jackson replies, "Not everyone," and McGuire chimes in "Only heroic people."

"You know what sandwich I get when I go to the deli? Snakes on a plain bagel."

"Don't forget Kwanzaa!"

The seminole point of the video is Win Butler of Arcade Fire lighting a smoke whilst the rest of the band sings a spirited rendition of "The Little Drummer Boy". Could he be any more badass and awkward?

This short comes three months after the release of the Justin Beiber episode, which was equally as magnificent.