The List: People to avoid this New Year's Eve

Staff Writer
Columbus Alive

New Year’s Eve gets a lot of hype, but all that buildup puts the evening on a pedestal, and, unfortunately, NYE parties can often fall flat before the ball drops. The start to your new year might never look like a romantic comedy, but you can still have a good time and dodge the evening’s downers. Whether you’re hosting or party-hopping, pour yourself another glass of punch and avoid these clichés.

PersonStrategicallyInchingCloser toYouNearMidnight

There’s nothing romantic about a creep trying not to look desperate.

PretentiousDude ina Scarf

It may be cold outside, baby, but it’s about 75 degrees in this party and you look ridiculous.

EternalFratBro

Uses terms like “chicks” and yells indoors, he’s also most likely to throw up that evening’s Chipotle on your new couch.

GirlDeckedOut inSequins

She came with Eternal Frat Bro, and her insecurity about not getting a midnight kiss is reflecting off every rhinestone.

Too-Drunk GuyMaking White Russians with Vodka andSkim Milk

New Year’s Eve is no place for bad cocktails. Someone call this guy a cab.

MisinformedNewsConsumer

She’s not sure how to make small talk, so instead she gabs about how ineffective Obamacare is, and assumes Ebola has something to do with ISIS. This is a Level 10 security threat to your vibe.

Person WhoWon’tShutUpAbout New Year’sResolutions

A party is not the time or place to talk about how difficult it’s going to be to give up processed meat in 2015.

Anyone withUntiedShoes

This is a solid rule of thumb for any party, not just ones on Dec. 31.

Crossfit Guy

He’s wearing dark jeans and a dark v-neck that’s about two sizes too small. He ran four IronMans this year, and you’re on your fifth scoop of guacamole.

The Bragging Mother

No one wants to hear about a three-year-old bilingual toddler who had a more rigorous application process for preschool than you did for college.