The List: Six reasons we're glad Columbus isn't hosting the Republican National Convention

Andy Downing, Columbus Alive
The Thurmanator at the Thurman Cafe

Republicans hope Cleveland's newfound championship rep is a good sign for the party's prospects heading into the presidential election season. Here in Columbus, we're just glad we're not playing host city for Donald Trump and Co. during this week's RNC. These are just a few reasons why.

How's that again?

We're less likely than those in Cleveland to have to attempt to correctly pronounce the name of RNC chairperson Reince Priebus in casual conversation.

No empty boasts from Columbus chefs

I have nothing against Cleveland chef Michael Symon - before it burned down, his Tremont eatery Lolita was a personal favorite - but his statement about not allowing Donald Trump to dine in any of his restaurants during the Republican National Convention bothered me specifically because it was so hollow. "But this isn't a Democratic [or] Republican thing, trust me. It's just that he creeps me out," he said during a call-in to a northeast Ohio sports talk radio station. If you're going to take a political stance, at least own it. (Semi-related: Columbus expat Liz Lessner likely would not have had similar issues hedging her words had the RNC set up camp here.)

Better tunes

The RNC has lined up the likes of Big & Rich, Mark McGrath and Dave Navarro. We get PromoWest Fest with PUP, Garbage, the Flaming Lips and Noel Gallagher, less affectionately known as "Potato" to his brother Liam. I'd call that a win for Columbus. (This jumps to "huge win" if and when Ted Nugent arrives in Cleveland for a gig or, God forbid, a speaking engagement.)

More beef

There'll be no need to elbow Mike Huckabee's large adult sons out of the way if you want to throw down a Thurmanator at German Village institution Thurman Cafe this week. Also, there's zero chance of being stuck behind Trump surrogate Chris Christie in line at McDonald's when he's making another burger run for the Donald.

Less highway/road congestion

Sure, PromoWest Fest and the AP Music awards might cause some neighborhood-specific slowdowns, but the flood of congresspeople, delegates and presidential candidates could have turned traffic in and around Downtown and the Short North into porridge. Not to mention the streets that would have been closed to foot traffic, when I just know there's a Kadabra lurking around that corner over there, officer. Speaking of which...

Pokémon Go

This has nothing to do with the convention - or this list, really - but there's a decent chance that including a couple Pokémon mentions here will offer a sweet, sweet SEO boost. #charizard #branding